pengertian

i just received a precious call from my father's sister, my aunt in Jakarta.
she is adorable, cheerful, full of life spirit, and inspirational.

she told me that love does not require any sacrifices, pengorbanan. but instead requires understanding, pengertian.

she advises that never use the word sacrifice for life and love. that is too deep and dreadful. sacrifice is not a precise word to describe that is is a way for you to be happy.

how do you feel if i said that i want you to be happy because i sacrificed everything for you?

the definition of sacrifice [ˈsækrɪˌfaɪs]
n
1. a surrender of something of value as a means of gaining something more desirable or of preventing some evil
2. a ritual killing of a person or animal with the intention of propitiating or pleasing a deity
3. a symbolic offering of something to a deity
4. the person, animal, or object surrendered, destroyed, killed, or offered
5. a religious ceremony involving one or more sacrifices
6. loss entailed by giving up or selling something at less than its value
7. (Group Games / Chess & Draughts) Chess the act or an instance of sacrificing a piece

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/sacrifice

wew! the definition is way too deep and scary? i found the closest meaning to explain the phrase "pengorbanan" which is:

"loss entailed by giving up or selling something"

in love i think i am not loosing anything, instead i am gaining more.

i gained understanding, tolerance, knowledge, and much more.....

dropping the past (28th dec 2009)

gather courage,
the journey has already started.
even if u go back u will not find the old shore again

even if u go back, those old toys will not be of any help anymore;
u are finished with them,
u will know they r only toys

now the real has to be found,
has to be inquired into.

and it is not very far either,
it is within u

time passing by (march 24th 2009)

when u got 5 deadlines in a week,
when u r trying to catch up with all of the work,
all of a sudden unimportant things that is not our ur list priorities just come up,
and u end up in doing the unimportant things.

such as:
u r in a middle of a task, u feel the floor is dirty,
so u vacuum the floor, or mop the floor
actually u would not do it if u r free.

like some temptation to check ur facebook and emails millions of time when u r in a group meeting
or checking hotels and travel itinerary in the net when u r writing ur 4000 words paper

but, when u seem to be finish with all that,
when u r in the relax mode,
checking emails and facebook is not that interesting as when we were in the hectic mode.
why?

u just want to wake up in the morning so relaxed and do everythings so slow...
[this is the phase of a beginning of a break]
but as days [2 days or 3] pass by,
u realize, u have to do something!

open ur window, smell the nice air and do plan ur break
although u r too relax to do it

u will realize days pass so fast and spring term already starts...

so....lets us do something today!:)

put "love " in ur cocoa!

nimantha, chan chan were sitting in my room. we chat and drank warm creamy-cocoa. we catch up on our stories..
it was like we have not share stories for a long time..
it felt soo nice.
when i was making cocoa for nimantha, i shouted," oh, i love u nimantha!"
becoz i felt it was a long time since i chat with her.
i gave the cocoa to her, and she was delighted, " rara!oh, i love u too, this cocoa is sooo good!"
"oh, really?i made it and i dont know how it tastes"
"i know why it is good rara, becoz u said u love me when u made it"

hmm...
put love in ur cocoa...:D
it makes it more delicious.
a new way of making cocoa discovered:D
yay!!

calling from the enchanted yellow-woods

i dont know what strucked me to go to the yellow woods near the main gate.

it was like a magic spell telling me to go to the woods as soon as possible becoz you may not see the yellow-aspirational-pretty leaves again.

yeah, this is your last year in IUJ....

this spell kept rolling again and again to go to the enchanted place and take some pics before the leaves fall by the coldness of the winter.

i met nimi in the hall and spontaneously asked her to come and get pics in the yellow woods.

she smiled and we went with purple bluish wear to contrast the leaves.

we were welcomed by a small gray puddle-like dog running thru the woods.

i went close to nimi and plead to nimi to make the dog have distant.

yeah, i have dogphobia ;P

well, we continued our photosession.

sitting here and there, laying like we dont care, stand near the beautiful yellow leaves..

btw, its gingko biloba, if i am not mistaken, thats what papa said when he saw my other pics.

but,

itch..itch...back of hip started to pain and got itchy

i was bitten by that damn insect that bitted me several times.

damn.

felt like i fell in the same hole again. this is the third time.

1st itme it is okay to learn something

2nd time is introspection

3rd is foolishness

i started to count the bites:1,2,3, and 4! one in my cheek.

before, they bitten my left forehead that in result made my left eye area swallen.

oh my, u cant imagine >.<

doing part time job in the library counter with my bangs on my eyes. i look like a horor actress.

hmm...well,

i dont know when the insect attack will continue to happen.

i thought they died couple days ago becoz the cold weather and slight snow

but, nooooooooooo tehy are still happy and alive and ready to suck our blood....

beware people!

when i was writing all of my sad tragedy, all of a sudden, my friend called me up..

she also got bitten,

oh my....so the attack of this fierce vampires will continued...

for all the ones who had been bitten, no fear!

those insects will get their share...!

:)

written in the cool nite when i have to do literature reading and study macroeconomics

(yes, mama, i am studying it....>.<)<

for nimi, november 10th 2009 via facebook

I cried the first evening when i was in IUJ. no friend.no family. all alone. even going to lounge made me scared.

i dunno anyone.

i spend 2-3 days gazing at my window, counting small cars passing by in the sunset.

i was alone.

:(

i start asking how can i survive in a village like this??

i start calling my family, telling them i am homesick.

one day, when i was opening my door, i saw a smiley face smiling at me.

she had the sweeted smile that i felt so nice..

we started talking....telling about alot of things.family. friends. country.

it was surprising meeting a person from a country that u only knew the name in the start (she was my 1st srilankan friend!)

we had so many similarity in culture.

we realized we had something in common.

-we like to talk about stupid unimportant things- that we did

then we laughed loud

she said she was quite different from other srilankan, then i also said me too!

we found more and more baka things inside of us

i realized more that i can tell any nayami-es with her.

we had some fight, of course (sooo much)

but that makes us more understanding in each other

when we had cross culture communication lectures, it was like we were talking about our friendship journey

understanding a person could not be in one nite

when nimi was sad, i seem to feel how she feels

when she was sick, i felt so worried

i dunno, it came just like that

she was always there for me

homesick, down, happy,..just name it

i just her hope her happiness cause she is a gem.

a beautiful pink colored gem from srilanka that i treasure till the end

31st anniversary

papa came back from taiwan last night.

due the delays back home because there were no planes landing since the eruption, he manage to switch the flight to the nearest city and used car.

we came looking tired. but he tried opening his luggage, it took time because he forgot where he put the keys.

he first gave guylian chocolates and taiwan's famous pineapple cookies (300 kcal each! but soo good) then he open one by one little packets from paper and gold cloth containing magnets, keychains, handkerchief, handphone straps and many more.

he gave mama a beautiful jade necklace,

he gave me and my sister a twin long-sleeve stripe t-shirt (papa and mama also do this, maybe they hope for twin daughters or think it is just cute),

he gave my brothers (also) twin t-shirt written with kanji (oh well, maybe they did wanted double twins!)

"wow pap, this time you brought lots of goodies..", i chuckled.

everytime he goes abroad for seminars and presentations, the simplest thing he will bring back home is buying dunkin donuts in OUR city airport or something from another airport;)

papa amazed me this time.

mama smiled.

the jade necklace was here 31st anniversary gift. she was waiting for papa since the morning.

excitedly messaging him from the moment she woke up.

awww, how cute.

i hope to see myself like this in my 31st marriage..

happy anniversary mama and papa.

we are the evidence of your 31 years marriage.

aha! waiting for the pizza celebration tonight!